I joined a running club…wtf

I had thought about joining a running club a few times but never did because after years of being made to run with a load of other people, I much preferred running on my own. Well one of our neighbours mentioned that she was taking part in a running clinic so against my better judgement, and despite being screamed at not to by my inner voice, I did it. I turn up tonight five minutes before the official start time (like any normal person would, right) and get my vaccination passport thingy scanned. This was a requirement for the running clinic, everyone had to show their vaccine passport and not one person kicked off about it. I was a little disappointed that there was none of those lovely folks fighting for our freedoms ready to pounce, but I figured they were busy protesting elsewhere, like at the hospitals. One lady did make a comment about how when hers was scanned, not only did it confirm that she had been vaccinated, but that the scanner was also able to obtain her name. I know, shocking really. How dare her information be given out! Never mind that they already knew her name because you know, she signed up. It’s the principle!!!! Anyways, it was ten minutes after the official start time and people were still arriving as if we weren’t waiting for them to start (nobheads) and I was starting to think that I made a mistake and that I should be on the couch chilling with Eric. That’s when the clapping and cheering starting (FML). I kid you not, within the first 15 minutes we had clapped and given ourselves a pat on the back five fuckin times, and the best bit, WE HADN’T EVEN MOVED!

To be fair, it was good once we got going. I reckon we managed to piss off every cyclists and pedestrian in our path. There was 40 birds broken down into 3 groups (walkers, run/walkers and runners) taking up the sidewalk and bike lane, cheering each other on in what can only be described as a complete and utter cluster fuck! I asked the organizer if we would be heading to the beach next time where you know, it’s quieter, and he responded that we would be but he did this route for our first run so he could control it more and keep an eye on everyone. Inner voice was begging to be let out but chilled and managed to see the funny side.

Mr C after laughing at the clapping and ranting about civvys was keen to know if I made any friends, like a parent does after their kids first day at school. As if I just stood there on my own scowling and eye rolling at the fuckin clapping………..don’t be a twat Nath.

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